The Cornell American
Put Your Mind to It, Go for It...
Mr. Belding’s visit inspires Saved by the Bell countdown.
By: Brett Greenberg on September 18th, 2005 at 2:04 PM
Didn’t you just hate it when you had different kids in all your classes in high school? Wasn’t it the worst when you weren’t the leader of every single club in school for a short period of time? Did it anger you like no other when no one supported/funded your design of a new school store? How annoyed were you when you felt like going on a murder mystery weekend, but everyone had plans? I could go on for hours. (This might be a nice moment for you to laugh, but honestly, I could.) Why couldn’t high school be more like Bayside? Depressing, huh? But I bet it made your day when none other than Dennis Haskins, aka Mr. Belding, arrived here in glorious Ithaca.
When Cornell first announced his visit in August, some among the Cornell community questioned why a college campus would bring in an early-90s TV star to speak. “What could a Mr. Belding provide for us?” those fools asked. “Pshh…If I wanted to see a bald guy say, ‘hey hey hey hey what is going on here?’ I could just pop in my “Saved By the Bell” DVDs and then fast forward to a scene in which Mr. Belding says, ‘hey hey hey hey what is going on here?’.” But they were wrong; they were oh so very wrong.
Mr. Belding came to our campus with a message to convey, a vivid portrait to paint with stories and memories of Mark-Paul, Lark, Dusty, Mario, Liz, and Tiff. Mr. Haskins delivered in this capacity, but he also gave much, much more. He presented to the “Saved By the Bell” fans a message of hope, determination, and purpose. In essence, here’s a message that I’m sending you…you can do what you want to do. A little work never hurt no one; it’s the only way to get things done. Mr. Haskins encouraged his fans to recognize what drives them and to pursue that dream. A sound bit of advice from the zen master of principal, his central point of the presentation was indeed inspiring.
In honor of Dennis Haskins’s epic visit, I have compiled my list of the top 6 Saved By the Bell episodes of all time.
6. Screech Predicts the Future
WOW! I still cannot get over the gall Peter Engel and the rest of the writing team exhibited when crafting this 22 minute masterpiece. When I saw Screech getting hit by that lightning bolt for the first time, I remember saying to myself, “Brett, you know hilarity’s knocking at the door!” How right was I? I liked the scene in which Screech envisions a tennis racket, and then, sure enough, A TENNIS RACKET! Also notable in this episode is a cameo from John Moschitta Jr. playing the role of Mr. Testaverde. You may remember him from the motormouth commercials. I know I do.
5. Mall Madness
If I had to spend the night in the mall with all my friends, I know I’d do it just like the gang. First, like Zack, I’d inquire about some footballs to trick the shopkeep into going into the back room. Then, I’d say, “Now, guys, let’s go.” I’d pray that the store owner is dumb enough to not notice six teens tangled up inside his tent, and finally, party time. What’s cooler than getting locked in a mall? Nothing. Who cares if Screech foils Zack’s master plan to obtain U2 tickets; this is a kid’s fantasy come true! The addition of the stalker thugs who turn out to be from the hit TV show “Candid Video” makes the third act a real winner. Note: The guys would return the mall years later and meet some nice homeless people around Christmas-time. How progressive!
4. Zack and Slater Fight
Who else had Zack in this one? Anyone? Now despite Slater’s obvious weight/ muscle/dancing/latino cool-factor/curly mullet advantage, I thought Zack could use his wit and charm to pull out a victory. But alas, Slater overpowers him, slamming him into the lockers and then pummeling him with repeated shots to the face. The famous Mr. Belding settles the score, however, convincing Slater and Zack that they are best friends and should never fight over a girl. You know what, Mr. Haskins…I respect your work on the show and the character, but I disagree with Mr. Belding’s advice here. Zack, Slater, if you’re out there reading, I say duke it out. Fight for the girl. She was worth it. Friends come and go, but short-lived high school romance with a guest star that will never return to the show and will probably find herself doing local spots for Listerine or Petco…that’s forever.
3. There’s No Hope with Dope
The late Brandon Tartokoff, who was the head of NBC at the time, made an appearance in this special episode. He was a great man, but honestly, I was more impressed with the acting chops of Eddie Garcia in the coveted role of Johnny Dakota, also known as Casanova Cool. The way that guy positions his two hands in the form of guns while making a “CHH” sound with his mouth always makes me re-analyze what the word “cool” means. Making a good living, raising a family, being happy…NO WAY. Johnny D…now that’s cool! I appreciate the inspirational message at the end of the show, that is, don’t do drugs. Actually, I just like watching Slater rush down the stairs, looking up to the camera, and saying “stupid.”
2. Friends Forever!
I have every Zack Attack song on iTunes. Even though it’s evident that they are lip-syncing to pre-recorded 80s back up singers, I can’t help but get lost in the chorus of “Did We Ever Have a Chance.” I’m still searching for “Let’s Stay Together,” and “School is a Bore (When You’re Stuck Indoors).” Wasn’t it odd that in real life (and by real life I don’t really mean real life) they were practicing for a Bar Mitzvah reception? They weren’t that good in the garage; who would hire high school-ers for the biggest day in little Ira’s life? How great was Zack’s ultra-cool hair cut that transformed him into “Mr. Madonna.”
1. I’m So Excited…
You guessed it. The classic episode that will be remembered until the end of time. Kids in the year 2309 will still quote the line, “remember when we snuck out to see E.T. in the middle of the night…we were scared.” This episode tugs at the heartstrings and never lets go. Hot Sundae would have sold a lot of records.